Friday, May 26, 2006

sunday best

just as you realise how late you are, an obstacle looms before you... what to wear for mass? shirt? jeans? yellow? green? don't worry, i'm only going to miss the entrance hymn, let's get this outfit perfected first. slippers? accessories? bag? perfume? and by the time you feel confident enough to walk big strides out of home and into church, the priest had just finished with "my dear friends, the good news of the lord." while you're still trying to murmur "praise you lord jesus christ" in mock response to an unheard gospel, the priest has already continued:

"i am very disappointed with the way some of us are dressed today. slippers? spaghetti straps? might i remind you that this is the house of god? when you go to an important function, do you choose your most comfortable clothes? no! you make sure that you are at your most presentable. and yet we gather here for worship in singlets! berms! miniskirts! the weather is no excuse... that's one of the reasons why we have air-conditioning! back in the old days people wore suits even in summer and those churches didn't even have fans! yada yada..."

luckily you've worn your sunday best and were not among those accused in this week's sermon. you heave a sigh of relief, but out of the corner of your eye, you catch a glimpse of someone whom the sermon is targeted at. he's an old man, probably over 70, his wrinkly limbs poking out of an almost tattered singlet and what looks like unwashed boxers. he slumps over his spot on the pews, with a 50cm radius of empty seats around him in the packed church. a voice begins to say "aiyo, why can't he dress up when he visits jesus? if it was some other priest, he might kena thrown out already lor." so unglam, right?

didn't that all sound somewhat wrong? punctuality issues aside, why does nobody ask this question: what is the sunday best? to me, it's straightforward. it's nothing to do with what you wear on the outside, but how you dress up spiritually. Matthew 5:23-4 goes "if you are bringing your offering to the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar, go and be reconciled with your brother first, and then come back and present your offering." if you need to mend a broken relationship, repay a certain spiritual debt, or even just say some words of encouragement to someone you know needs it, then do so before going to mass and you'll be dressed in your sunday best. regardless of what you have on your back.

it goes some way beyond this too. Matthew 7:3 asks "Why do you observe the splinter in your brother's eye and never notice the great log in your own?" "Do not judge, and you will not be judged; because the judgments you give are the judgments you will get, and the standard you use will be the standard used for you." i always harbour some resentment for priests who preach with so much fire that every line becomes a pronouncement of judgment. is that really how we behave as christians? jesus forgave mary magdalene, whom the pharisees wanted to stone. Matthew 23:4 records jesus' sharp tone against them "They tie up heavy burdens and lay them on people's shoulders, but will they lift a finger to move them? Not they!" are we in danger of becoming pharasaical?

and then it reaches out. Matthew 25:40 "In truth I tell you, in so far as you did this to one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did it to me." Matthew 19:24 "It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for someone rich to enter the kingdom of Heaven." Matthew 19:30 "Many who are first will be last, and the last, first." so when you see one of christ's brothers needing help, do not waste time judging the hypocrites forming the 50cm perimeter around him - go straight up to him and offer him your best. yes, stepping out of the comfort zone isn't easy, but that is how christ's mission for us looks like. start by just saying hi, getting to know the person at least, and then build up from there!

... so now mass has ended and everyone is squeezing their way out, some trying hard not to blurt vulgarities while exiting the carpark, others simply waiting to call the next person to honk "unchristian". the heaviest irony is that the so-called christian community is really little more than a farcical bunch of middle-class snobs trying to fulfil their sunday obligations and book a place in heaven. are you going to leave your christian mission behind in the pews? or will you heed the lord's calling and tend to his sheep?

i'll end off with Matthew 6:28-34:
"And why worry about clothing? Think of the flowers growing in the fields; they never have to work or spin; yet I assure you that not even Solomon in all his royal robes was clothed like one of these. Now if that is how God clothes the wild flowers growing in the field which are there today and thrown into the furnace tomorrow, will he not much more look after you, you who have so little faith? So do not worry; do not say, "What are we to eat? What are we to drink? What are we to wear?" It is the gentiles who set their hearts on all these things. Your heavenly Father knows you need them all. Set your hearts on his kingdom first, and on God's saving justice, and all these other things will be given you as well. So do not worry about tomorrow: tomorrow will take care of itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Sunday, May 14, 2006

pomo greg I

just wondering... how is it that i can both believe that the one worth waiting for is worth waiting an entire lifetime up till the final breath while also acceding to every opportunity is love in its infancy... why beauty is only as deep as the observer while goodness tends to show on one's countenance... the proverbial do unto others as thou wilt have unto thyself even as justice and fairness to all regardless contains similar amounts of moral righteousness... even the easily accepted logic breeds reason and persuasion in the interest of rationality and utilitarian equity faces contradiction with rationalisation begets mind-numbing bureaucracy and ends-serving amorality in the service of status quo.

these truisms have a simple similarity: they are expounded proudly in the absence of context.

contextualisation (note its subtle differences with rationalisation) brings form to essence; it gives a love story sordid details, it matches quantum mechanics to the world, it allows political rhetoric to blossom into war. the human experience is but an unfathomable sublime abstraction if not for the expressive agency of language, and thus communication. your feelings are truisms, up till the point your expression contextualises it for me, whereupon i see through your glasses, thus your experience is empathised into a common reality between us.

context is very much an inextricable nature of reality (i will critique reality some other time), and in saying that different contexts varies the commonality of experiencing realities between different entities, i concede that reality is very much subject to relativism. in one context, truism A may apply, yet in another, its complete opposite truism B makes marvelous sense, even if these opposites are as contrasting as black and white, or even mutually exclusive pronouncements of morality. killing a person for his money is wrong, so is killing out of jealousy, although killing in a fit of rage seems slightly more forgivable; in a war we kill each other fairly; a cop is allowed to kill if the suspect is substantially dangerous while killing the unborn child in defense of the mother's life is almost universally faultless. in this one subject of taking life, myriad contexts already present their fervent cases: could you live happily if thou shalt not kill crept into your mind (and held you back) when you had the chance to kill the eventual murderer of your family?

so i wonder if the postmodern critique of objective reality and absolute truths could hold more than just some water. indeed the entire paragraph on killing above reeks clearly of modernistic rationalisation either way. neither does removing the absoluteness of morals dilute its capacity as some of life's greatest pieces of advice. in this case, can we say pomo is attempting to move closer to the truth? that contextualisation is a more apt appraisal of reality than fundamentalism?

watch out for pomo greg.

Friday, May 12, 2006

automatic typing

a mind is a terrible thing to waste... and mine is one of the most terrible. this week was supposed to be packed with activity... straight out of the exam panic and into the css/foc delirium. yet strangely, i found myself settled aimlessly at home... a bored and dazed phantasm fiddling with this bizarre yet oddly cognizant surrounding. has it been too long away from my own room, that i actually need an entire week of stupor to reacquaint myself?

nonetheless, work is piling. after skipping one mm practice and a games comm mtg, i find myself slipping back into discordant anonymity with my responsibilities. granted the dizziness is overbearing, but the consonant effort is sorely lacking. why? don't i wish to help out? isn't that my sole purpose in life? to be at the service of others?

and yet this listless illation about purpose only serves to beguile. why ought i serve? when i mutter "purpose" like a prairie dog, do i really care about it? have i got a clear grasp of that exceedingly abstract and sublime concept? what is my purpose? and why must i have a purpose?

it may seem like effusive dawdling, and indeed it might prove to be so. for even if i have yet to completely demystify the grand paradoxes in my psyche, i could still get on with what i have to do. and so here i go again attempting to nudge myself into action. so much inertia in here, so many tasks awaiting accomplishment...

this is definitely not the time to ask more questions eh? sighs.

Friday, May 05, 2006

singaporean myths



so... are we apathetic or not?

will the govt really fire opposition voters?

is the secrecy of our vote truly compromised?

are there myriad isa agents eavesdropping on our every phone conversation?

will our swat team snipe us from range if we suan lky?

is sph filled with pro-pap journalists?

does temasek holdings make good economic sense?

will we really get back our cpf one day?

is the opposition bad for singapore?

is pap good for singapore?

talk about conspiracy theories... is it even possible to know any truth about such issues? perhaps we've all been duped! perhaps we are not trying hard enough to search for clues. perhaps we are not being critical enough. perhaps we have succumbed so long to mental imprisonment that subsequent freedom would be so shocking that we end up choosing to remain incarcerated.

we are the myth, and we are unravelling before our very eyes - but are we aware of it?